Dear Santa,
Long time no see – hope all is well up there. To be perfectly honest, I stopped believing in you many years ago. In fact, I’m not even sure if I ever truly believed in you growing up, since Christmas at home was treated as more of a financial crisis than a cause for celebration. In any case, apologies for not writing sooner, and more so, for writing to you in a public forum. (Besides, you don’t really expect me to mail you a letter to the North Pole, do you?)
Earlier today, as I was helping my nephew write a letter to you (by the way, he wants a video game and a car), I thought why not send you a note myself as well? I’ve been a good girl – ok fine, except for that incident in Paris this year – but mostly, I’ve been good. And since I’m a bit too old for dolls and toys (well, most toys) I wanted to ask you for something I can’t find in stores. This Christmas, I want to meet a guy. Allow me to elaborate: a guy that’s strong yet vulnerable, (really) funny yet profound, knowledgeable yet blissfully ignorant, confident yet modest, modern yet traditional, cute yet oblivious, ambitious yet rational, established yet humble, outgoing yet comfortable in his solitude, and simply genuine. Oh, and someone 5’10” or above preferably. Of course, chemistry goes without saying but I’ll say it anyway so we’re perfectly clear. No chemistry is a no-go. I’m sure Mrs. Claus is nodding her head in unison right now – I mean, ultimately, who doesn’t want these qualities in their significant other?
So do me a favor, will ya? As you’re ho-ho-ho’ing your way across the sky and squeezing your way down people’s chimneys, keep an eye out for my gift. And you can skip the bow and wrapping paper – after all, all that matters is what’s on the inside.
Sincerely,
Searching in the Wrong Aisle
Long time no see – hope all is well up there. To be perfectly honest, I stopped believing in you many years ago. In fact, I’m not even sure if I ever truly believed in you growing up, since Christmas at home was treated as more of a financial crisis than a cause for celebration. In any case, apologies for not writing sooner, and more so, for writing to you in a public forum. (Besides, you don’t really expect me to mail you a letter to the North Pole, do you?)
Earlier today, as I was helping my nephew write a letter to you (by the way, he wants a video game and a car), I thought why not send you a note myself as well? I’ve been a good girl – ok fine, except for that incident in Paris this year – but mostly, I’ve been good. And since I’m a bit too old for dolls and toys (well, most toys) I wanted to ask you for something I can’t find in stores. This Christmas, I want to meet a guy. Allow me to elaborate: a guy that’s strong yet vulnerable, (really) funny yet profound, knowledgeable yet blissfully ignorant, confident yet modest, modern yet traditional, cute yet oblivious, ambitious yet rational, established yet humble, outgoing yet comfortable in his solitude, and simply genuine. Oh, and someone 5’10” or above preferably. Of course, chemistry goes without saying but I’ll say it anyway so we’re perfectly clear. No chemistry is a no-go. I’m sure Mrs. Claus is nodding her head in unison right now – I mean, ultimately, who doesn’t want these qualities in their significant other?
Sincerely,
Searching in the Wrong Aisle
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